To tell someone you feel nothing for them
is a harsh thing
and it sucks more then anything to hear
I always tell myself that people like me
not like crush on me like me but more like they don’t dislike me
and I know I do things that are real
and often that scares people
I’m well aware that my realness frightens people
humans are used to fake generic people
who wear to much makeup and aren’t
who they say they are
but I’m very true to myself
and the fact that I often have confidence
may also come as a shock
since men are so naive to think that
pretty girls should be stupid
and that they should cry all the time
dumb assumptions like that
you can judge me all you want
you can avoid me
you can think you know me
because I’ve told you a lot about me
but let me tell you something
there isn’t one woman out there
who is as much me as I am
not one of them is like me
and I’m a pretty hard person to find
sure you can spot me in a crowd
but you will not have the guts to talk to me
I’m aware of how “deep” I can be
I only say things like that because
I live everyday with meaning
do you know why I do that?
because I don’t know when it’s my turn to leave this earth
often times I thought I would die
especially when I was younger and going through some crazy shit
I thought everything was my fault because I’m so different then everyone else
but the reality of it all is that
I’m always going to be different
I’m always going to stick out like a sore thumb
God created me this way
He made me
Hard to understand
full to the brim with more then enough love
an admirer of humans
Odd
Men are so stupid
who is going to be the one guy to change that view for me?
or how about the fact that most are all the same?
All they do is care about themselves
there is not one sensitive bone in their bodies!
You assholes don’t even try to get to know the girl who is crazy about you
you just go ahead and tell her you don’t like her
she tries really hard for you
you wears classy dresses
adds a little more makeup on to her pretty face
but your all too stupid to notice
because you don’t care
woman give birth to baby’s
men don’t
and you go and just disrespect her
after all that she did
men need to learn to appreciate woman more
because we do a whole fucking lot
and your stupid to make her do all of the work
Maybe I’ve got some things I need to work on
maybe I’m a little fucked up
but so are all of you
I say “please”
I say “thank you”
but you are never going to get a girl
if your not thankful for what you have already
I’m real sick of rejection
I’ve just about had it
IM A NICE GIRL!
IM A GOOD GIRL!
I wouldn’t hurt a fly
and I only kill spiders when my sister
or mother screams at me to kill it
since I’m not afraid
UGH
I’m too nice to give anyone the silent treatment
I’m still confused
I’m sorry but our situation makes no sense to me
I’m usually real good at figuring guys out but you
Dude, I just do not get it
I stopped my overthinking
and taking in so much detail
but this doesn’t make any sense
you can tell me a million times
you feel nothing
you’re not interested
but my gut is being stupid
and saying there’s hope
but I don’t understand any of it..
I don’t understand
when you speak to me I hear admiration in your voice
is that you just being nice too?
Do you think of me like everyone else?
Do you think of me at all?
I do make you laugh
I really wish I knew all the answers
I wish you’d give me some answers
What’s it going to take for me to just be something to you?
or for you to trust me?
would you dislike me even more if I said I miss you?
I don’t know why I have hope
your the only one who was there when god saved me..
doesn’t that count for something?
you stayed on the phone with me too
there is no way I’m going to let myself feel like this tomorrow
but you can be sure
I’m going to show you what your missing out on
It is a pretty big loss for you to not feel a thing for me
I’ve said it twice or three times now
I sure hope someday it’ll settle in your mind
Sorry I’m ranting
I don’t usually do this
none of it makes any sense
I’m never really all that wrong about these kinds of things
I didn’t do anything wrong
I just overthought a bunch of small actions
which in my eyes were suppose to mean something..
I thought nice guys meant things like that
but then again
jerks can often pretend to be nice guys
or most nice guys are just sorta insensitive
then again
I know of no man who has a sensitive bone in his body
well that is a depressing fact
haha wow that is depressing
Well I pray that someday someone will change that for me
show me there is at least one guy
who can cry big tears
or smile with incredible happiness
no more numbness
ugh
I strongly dislike anger
I’m just flat out mad and disappointed
I would thoroughly enjoy snapping at someone
and then running away
but this too shall pass
just like me incredibly stupid feelings
for YOU!
WHY DO I LIKE YOU SO MUCH?
ohhhhh myyyyy hollllyyy cowwww
ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ughhhhhhh
you do not even remotely deserve to know why I have a crush on you
so I’m not going to tell you
I’m not telling you anymore secrets either
you can work to gain that
I will talk to you
but everything else you can ask me about
why?
well because your makin me feel this way
and ive asked plenty so it’s your turn
wanna be friends?
then prove it
I’m used to people leaving and not being here for me
and I’m used to them ditching me after saying they are my friend
so you wanna do that then sure
I don’t get why you want me to text you and call you still when you don’t like me
I bet someday you will though
and I will drive you crazier then you do me
just wait
it’ll happen..
rebelliousoceannymph 