You know
he is really stupid to not see the greatness in me
I was really stupid to not see the greatness in myself
but he
he fucked up
he really fucked up
I may not be able to get over him now
but I will at some point
even if it takes
a long time
when he left I didn’t cry
not very much
at least not over him
just over the baby
he really just thinks of himself
it’s like he stopped having a big crush on me
and starting having feelings for himself
how does that happen?
did him making sweet love to me
just happen to boost up his confidence?
or could he have been like that all along?
Why do I do that?
I fall for guys who have so much confidence or a big ego
don’t get me wrong, I can have that problem too but it’s only because I’ve thought of others my whole life and I thought it was about time to put myself first
I mean it would be pretty unfair to call me some sort of name while I’m just trying to live
so it may be unfair to call him one
I guess everything was just “bad timing” AGAIN
which forces me to think that his intention wasn’t just to make me happy
it was more for his selfish needs too
it’s always been like that
so hopefully this next time
someone will actually find me who thinks more of
my needs
one day
or sometime soon
this bad shit can’t hang around for long
I’m not sure of what to call him
he isn’t much of an ex
since kisses only happened a few times
it was more technology
which means
we weren’t given much of a chance
well that sucks
I had his baby who was unborn beore she was born
it does seem like he is just another asshole who screwed me over
but he is too nice to be an asshole
but he does need an attitude adjustment
but then again
who doesn’t?
it’s just the negativity that bugs me
that is why I am letting him go
for good this time
I’m sorry if my posts lately have been a bit disappointing to you all
obviously a whole lot has happened
and recently I’ve been trying my best to get out of the house
so that just adds more stress
but I’ve been writing everyday
I’ve been trying to write everyday
once or twice
writing poetry when inspired
you know the usual
I’ve decided that I’ll cook more now a days
and clean more obviously
just getting prepared to live by myself
and since I gave away so many clothes
I kind of don’t have much
I’d really like to know
who the hell is thinking about me 24/7 now
I swear!
my nose continues to feel itchy
so I constantly rub it!
or wrinkle it
or scratch it
and I’ve sneezed a few
dozen times too
like seriously!!
who is the fool that thinks of me all the time?
I’d really like to find out
rebelliousoceannymph 