Give Me Love Like Never Before Cause Lately I’ve Been Craving More

You know whenever you sneeze or itch your nose a lot it means someone is thinking of you 

I honestly cannot tell you how many times these past two weeks that has happened to me

because it’s a lot a lot a lot a lot

and I do not have allergies so it’s gotta be someone thinking about me

I’ve been dying to know who

because my nose wont stop itching!!!

it wont

and even my mom knows why

I’ve had the flu for like two days now

unable to get out of bed

and my nose just itches!

I have been a good girl

I have been waiting patently for good things to happen

 and I’ve been living like I’m suppose to 

so I ask you 

when is it my turn to fall into love? huh?

I’m not asking for perfect love 

I know that doesn’t exist 

I’m asking for real love 

the kind of love that keeps you up at night 

brings warmth to your heart 

and tears of joy to your eyes 

I want the love where I can be held at night in someones arms 

and know that no matter what I say or what I do that upsets them they stay 

I want that person that will stay through everything 

I know the world doesn’t owe me that 

and no one owes me anything 

but I’d give anything to feel safe 

and happy 

and loved in someones arms 

just once

 

 

 

I Wont Be Far From Where You Are if Ever You Should Call, You Meant More To Me Then Anyone I Ever Loved At All

You know 

he is really stupid to not see the greatness in me 

I was really stupid to not see the greatness in myself 

but he 

he fucked up 

he really fucked up 

I may not be able to get over him now 

but I will at some point 

even if it takes

a long time 

when he left I didn’t cry 

not very much 

at least not over him 

just over the baby 

he really just thinks of himself 

it’s like he stopped having a big crush on me 

and starting having feelings for himself 

how does that happen?

did him making sweet love to me 

just happen to boost up his confidence? 

or could he have been like that all along?

Why do I do that? 

I fall for guys who have so much confidence or a big ego 

don’t get me wrong, I can have that problem too but it’s only because I’ve thought of others my whole life and I thought it was about time to put myself first 

I mean it would be pretty unfair to call me some sort of name while I’m just trying to live 

so it may be unfair to call him one 

I guess everything was just “bad timing” AGAIN

which forces me to think that his intention wasn’t just to make me happy 

it was more for his selfish needs too 

it’s always been like that 

so hopefully this next time 

someone will actually find me who thinks more of 

my needs 

one day 

or sometime soon

 this bad shit can’t hang around for long 

I’m not sure of what to call him

he isn’t much of an ex 

since kisses only happened a few times 

it was more technology 

which means

we weren’t given much of a chance 

well that sucks 

I had his baby who was unborn beore she was born 

it does seem like he is just another asshole who screwed me over 

but he is too nice to be an asshole

but he does need an attitude adjustment 

but then again 

who doesn’t? 

it’s just the negativity that bugs me 

that is why I am letting him go

for good this time 

I’m sorry if my posts lately have been a bit disappointing to you all 

obviously a whole lot has happened 

and recently I’ve been trying my best to get out of the house 

so that just adds more stress 

but I’ve been writing everyday 

I’ve been trying to write everyday 

once or twice 

writing poetry when inspired 

you know the usual 

I’ve decided that I’ll cook more now a days 

and clean more obviously 

just getting prepared to live by myself 

and since I gave away so many clothes 

I kind of don’t have much 

I’d really like to know 

who the hell is thinking about me 24/7 now 

I swear! 

my nose continues to feel itchy 

so I constantly rub it! 

or wrinkle it 

or scratch it 

and I’ve sneezed a few

dozen times too 

like seriously!! 

who is the fool that thinks of me all the time?

I’d really like to find out